surreal

I’ve set foot inside my dashboard where I sometimes come out with a post, like this one, but a lot of times I never make it through. I get caught up in other things – other thoughts, life gets in the way- and I intend to keep it like that.

As I listen to my upstairs neighbor strum his guitar, I’m reminded that it’s the simple things that set my feet to dancing. I have so many things to be thankful for, and even more to come in this life.

I live in the midst of a community with many people, lots of hurts, lots of joys, and many moments that go unnoticed. Talking to a volunteer today about the loss of her brother, or another about her mother’s third bout with cancer, and the glimmer of hope – the light that I see in the eye of the believer in the midst of pain.

Even with all of these things, life moves strangely on, just marches right out the door with it’s life stages and all. I think it all hit me in a weird way today. It’s just that, I experience life very deeply, your hurt becomes my hurt, and I’d like to think this is Biblical. Or maybe, just insane.

But, I find it here, in Romans 12:15

Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

(which, I think means I have a pretty good argument for it being Biblical)

But what about those emotions with which we have no grid to identify. Are we to pretend? Or expect something deeper? I know on a gut level we are called to love, and love we do. I guess, this is a lifelong process.

With the hurts, come the joys, and one so recent – it’s in my own apartment. My roommate, Courtney, got engaged on Saturday night. I’m so glad for her and Graham, glad that they get to see the gospel lived out in the analagous picture of marriage. I know for both of them, this makes their hearts leap! Mine too, leaps, for them.

Oh how life, picks up it’s tail, and moves on. It does, and I, find myself, so often clinging to the familiar, my selfishness that I mask with a word; independence. I don’t want it to pass me by, I want to live fully and deeply and in reality. It’s just hard to experience grief with others and joy with others, all in the same, day…or few minutes…

Maybe this is the tie in – the thing we’re looking for in all of this… that is just a few verses earlier in Romans 12… I think this helps for me, to see how I’m called to live, love, grieve, and rejoice…

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

joyful in hope

patient in affliction

faithful in prayer

These things I can do, thank you for the concise list, Paul.

or as the message puts it:

Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

I want to be a good friend who loves deeply, but I don’t always want to play second fiddle, but these go hand in hand.

I have a lot to chew on. But, in the mean time, I’ll practice playing second fiddle, maybe the strum of the guitar could use some harmony.