Last night in my small group we were talking about how your spouse will let you down every now & then, and that it’s better to expect it than to get womped in the face when you realize that he or she is not perfect.

We’re going through a great book by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend called, “Rescue Your Love Life.”

It reminded me of a post I wrote and a talk I listened to before Jeremy and I got married. In fact, about a year before we were engaged. It’s a talk called, “How to Avoid Marital Failure” the talk is excellent.

Here is the re-post:

I have this little audio clip from Alistair Begg that Jeremy sent me days after we met. So interesting that now I will be marrying the guy that sent me a clip titled “How to Avoid Marital Failure.” Nonetheless, these little nuggets of wisdom ring so true to me that I thought I’d share them with the blog world.

Before Alistair launches into his main clip about marriage, he first addresses the single population, speaking very highly of them, challenging them to pray for the marriages around them. That God uses singles to minister to marrieds more often than you might think.

Here are the ways to avoid marital failure according to Alistair Begg:

1.Do not be so foolish as if to maintain as if it could not happen to you.

2.Do not allow the business of life to disguise neglect

3.Don’t make the mistake of taking each other for granted

4.Be daily in prayer for the health of your marriage and the harmony of your home

5.Be sacrificial in the expression of your love for each other

6.Be imaginative, daring and occassionaly extravagant in displaying your affection (he adds righteousness is not a synonym for boring)

7.Be sure you don’t use your children as the glue that holds you or the wedge that separates you.

8.Be ruthless in resisting anyone and anything that will draw your affections from each other.

9.Be ready to listen to and ready to speak about whats going on inside each other’s heads.

10.Be certain that a great marriage is possible with divine enabling and human effort.

11.Be aware of how quickly time is passing and seize the day.

Audio below:

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Thoughts?

There are lots of things that can & should be said about leadership. There are several people who say it best. One of them, Seth Godin, makes several pointed remarks about how we lead, and how it’s different from management.

Exclusive interview with Seth Godin from GiANT Impact on Vimeo.

Speaking of leadership and learning, check out the Chick-fil-A leadercast which will be simulcasted at Port City Community Church on May 6th, 2011. Lots of respectable leaders are on this panel, including Seth Godin and a fave, Dave Ramsey.

What books and blogs do you recommend for knowing/learning mommyhood and baby?

Also, what things should I absolutely, without a doubt register for, and what things should I skip over?

Any advice from knowing-mommies is much appreciated!

This is why I’ve felt in a bit of a whirlwind since Wednesday:

Wednesday

• 5 pm left for Columbia, NC (near the outerbanks)
• somewhere along the way I had the worst Bojangles sandwhich of my life, ick.
• 8:30 pm arrived in Columbia, NC

Thursday

• 12:30pm left for Wilmington
• 4pm arrived in Wilmington

Friday

• 10am left for Cary, NC
• 12pm arrived in Cary, NC

Saturday

• 9am left Cary, NC for Greenville, NC
• 10:30 am arrived in Greenville, NC
• 2pm left Greenville, NC for Wilmington, NC
• 4pm arrived in Wilmington, NC

Sunday

• 8am drop Jeremy off at River to Sea race
• 11am arrive home from race
• and now we’re resting and napping, maybe you see why?

I guess this is a small taste of what Jeremy’s travel schedule is normally like.

I did manage to grab a few pictures along the way.

icing cupcakes at home

in mickey mouse wraps!

slicing strawberries for yogurt parfaits!

yogurt parfait display

learning the couponing ins and outs

the completion of the river to sea run!

It’s been a fun and eventful week & weekend. I’m glad that it’s winding down. Now to head out to look for seeds and starter plants! Can’t wait to see what I’ll find!

Here are a few things that I’ve just loved in the past weeks.

new favorite valentine candy

boombalattis mini sampler!

venti iced caramel macchiato

picnics in the park

sunshine

also, not pictured, but really should be, mini bottled gingerales, saltines, crayons in a bowl on my coffee table, pink and lovely alstromeria in blue masons jars, and bojangles sweet tea & fries.

I’ve been reading articles today about blog optimization, and blog followers, and how to run a successful one. I think in this case, it really starts with my readers. So what do you want to see more of here?

I’ve created this nifty little poll, this will help me narrow my focus and give YOU more of what you want to read here. Please pick your top 3.

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If there is something not listed that you’d like to read more about, please comment below. Thanks for being a reader of kellycain.com!

I am in love, LOVE, with Amy Butler’s fabrics.

I am doing some nursery pre-planning, and ikea trip prep, and I’ve almost wanted every single Amy Butler fabric I’ve laid eyes on. Here are a couple I’m swooning over.

Watch out for the full nursery plan, in about a month!

It feels painful. But it’s undeniable when it’s happening. That feeling of discomfort, for awhile, or for a long time. The kind of change I’m talking about comes from within, not external circumstances with change. But that kind of gut-level, heart-level deep kind of change that comes along every now and then & makes you re-evaluate, and re-examine life as you know it.

I was recently with a group of women who were talking about how they couldn’t pick out circumstances in their lives, like when someone asks you a question, for example, “What was a pivotal point in your walk with God?” They would come up blank. I don’t know if it’s some kind of grand flaw, or a blessing in disquise, but I’ve always been so introspective, so self-aware, that at times it’s really painful. I know when I’m “not myself.” I know when I am completely myself. I even know the in-betweens.

A lot of it is necessary to go through life to know the “triggers” to read the internal “gauges.” In a book that truly changed my life, called Changes that Heal, he talks about how there is a formula for change.

conflict + time = change

Interestingly enough, in my Beth Moore study (mentioned in this post) she talks about this formula, in the life of David, how the dynasty of Saul (over time) grew weaker and the kingdom of David was growing stronger. Bringing about the Lord’s promise.

In my life lately there has been a bit of conflict, with my health, wrestling with the Lord, and more that I’d rather not mention. It’s so comforting to know that this conflict, will bring about change in my heart and my life. As I am formed closer into His image, as I was created.

So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Genesis 1:27

Becoming what we already are in Christ, what a glorious and painful process!

I can’t tell you how many blog posts I’ve written… or started writing about this week, and the events that have transpired. I know several of you read my “password protected post” which was not in anyway shape or form an attempt to gain more readers, or a marketing ploy (as I was accused of) but was simply because I did not want the whole free world (aka all of facebook) if they chose to have access to some very personal details of my life. I would have sent an email, but I have a feeling, that less of you would have read it, there is something about anything hidden that makes us even more intrigued.

This week has been a doozy for me emotionally, the ups and the downs, and the consistency of nausea.

This morning during my Beth Moore study, on David, Seeking a Heart Like His, which I absolutely love. (more on that later) I had the chance to process through all of my emotions that I experienced on Monday during the biopsy.

1. The unexpected. It has been said, to “expect the unexpected.” Which, I feel like I do a pretty good job of in the daily of life, but on this very day, it was a scary reality.

2. The release. I had been thinking about it for so long, well, since December (which is a long time to think about a biopsy) and I knew that at the end of the day I was going to be okay with the result no matter what it was, malignant or benign. That God, in His goodness, would carry me through and that He would work it together for good. And that, more than that, I needed to let go, and give it all to God. I am His anyway. Completely.

Today’s message was so good. It was about God, His goodness, remembering what He has done for us, and to believe that He is Good! We camped out in 2 Sam 7:28 for quite awhile, I was captivated by the thought of the Davidic covenant, the promise of a new leader, the lineage of Christ!

For you are God, O Sovereign Lord. Your words are truth, and you have promised these good things to your servant.

We talked through this verse, quite a bit.

1. HE is God.

2. His word is TRUTH. meaning it is TRUE. not only that, but the NIV says, His words are TRUSTWORTHY.

3. He has promised GOOD THINGS.

In all of this, I was so thankful, for these basic foundational truths of my walk with God. The clarity of it. And how this week, these 3 things were made real in my life, and I’m so thankful. The result of the test was good. Everything is fine. Cancer free!

If you were a part of this journey with me in prayer, you have NO idea how God used you. I hope I shed a little bit of light on it in this post. Thank you so very much.