update: turns out we didn’t get to find out today! so many things in the medical world are a mystery to me! We hopefully will find out next Tuesday! Sorry for the false alarm.

but you can still vote.

is it a…

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Jer and I  just got back from a marriage conference on love & respect, based on the book Love & Respect. This was not your typical marriage conference, there were singles there, (gasp!) Principles were taught that anyone could benefit from hearing, regardless of your situation, married, single, widowed, divorced, separated, dating, engaged…

The whole thing is based on two simple principles.

LOVE EMPOWERS a husband to energize his wife

RESPECT EMPOWERS a wife to energize her husband

Bottom line: unless we embrace these concepts we’ll find ourselves caught in the crazy cycle.

If we find ourselves stuck in this pattern, there is hope.

It was 9 hours of content. Straight up. Good stuff. The conference was held at the Holiday Inn Sunspree at Wrightsville Beach, it was so lovely there with this beautiful weather that it was hard to go inside for the conference.

Afterwards we had lunch at David’s Deli in Lumina Station and then went to the library book sale. More on that to come.

Last night in my small group we were talking about how your spouse will let you down every now & then, and that it’s better to expect it than to get womped in the face when you realize that he or she is not perfect.

We’re going through a great book by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend called, “Rescue Your Love Life.”

It reminded me of a post I wrote and a talk I listened to before Jeremy and I got married. In fact, about a year before we were engaged. It’s a talk called, “How to Avoid Marital Failure” the talk is excellent.

Here is the re-post:

I have this little audio clip from Alistair Begg that Jeremy sent me days after we met. So interesting that now I will be marrying the guy that sent me a clip titled “How to Avoid Marital Failure.” Nonetheless, these little nuggets of wisdom ring so true to me that I thought I’d share them with the blog world.

Before Alistair launches into his main clip about marriage, he first addresses the single population, speaking very highly of them, challenging them to pray for the marriages around them. That God uses singles to minister to marrieds more often than you might think.

Here are the ways to avoid marital failure according to Alistair Begg:

1.Do not be so foolish as if to maintain as if it could not happen to you.

2.Do not allow the business of life to disguise neglect

3.Don’t make the mistake of taking each other for granted

4.Be daily in prayer for the health of your marriage and the harmony of your home

5.Be sacrificial in the expression of your love for each other

6.Be imaginative, daring and occassionaly extravagant in displaying your affection (he adds righteousness is not a synonym for boring)

7.Be sure you don’t use your children as the glue that holds you or the wedge that separates you.

8.Be ruthless in resisting anyone and anything that will draw your affections from each other.

9.Be ready to listen to and ready to speak about whats going on inside each other’s heads.

10.Be certain that a great marriage is possible with divine enabling and human effort.

11.Be aware of how quickly time is passing and seize the day.

Audio below:

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Thoughts?

There are lots of things that can & should be said about leadership. There are several people who say it best. One of them, Seth Godin, makes several pointed remarks about how we lead, and how it’s different from management.

Exclusive interview with Seth Godin from GiANT Impact on Vimeo.

Speaking of leadership and learning, check out the Chick-fil-A leadercast which will be simulcasted at Port City Community Church on May 6th, 2011. Lots of respectable leaders are on this panel, including Seth Godin and a fave, Dave Ramsey.

What books and blogs do you recommend for knowing/learning mommyhood and baby?

Also, what things should I absolutely, without a doubt register for, and what things should I skip over?

Any advice from knowing-mommies is much appreciated!

This is why I’ve felt in a bit of a whirlwind since Wednesday:

Wednesday

• 5 pm left for Columbia, NC (near the outerbanks)
• somewhere along the way I had the worst Bojangles sandwhich of my life, ick.
• 8:30 pm arrived in Columbia, NC

Thursday

• 12:30pm left for Wilmington
• 4pm arrived in Wilmington

Friday

• 10am left for Cary, NC
• 12pm arrived in Cary, NC

Saturday

• 9am left Cary, NC for Greenville, NC
• 10:30 am arrived in Greenville, NC
• 2pm left Greenville, NC for Wilmington, NC
• 4pm arrived in Wilmington, NC

Sunday

• 8am drop Jeremy off at River to Sea race
• 11am arrive home from race
• and now we’re resting and napping, maybe you see why?

I guess this is a small taste of what Jeremy’s travel schedule is normally like.

I did manage to grab a few pictures along the way.

icing cupcakes at home

in mickey mouse wraps!

slicing strawberries for yogurt parfaits!

yogurt parfait display

learning the couponing ins and outs

the completion of the river to sea run!

It’s been a fun and eventful week & weekend. I’m glad that it’s winding down. Now to head out to look for seeds and starter plants! Can’t wait to see what I’ll find!

Here are a few things that I’ve just loved in the past weeks.

new favorite valentine candy

boombalattis mini sampler!

venti iced caramel macchiato

picnics in the park

sunshine

also, not pictured, but really should be, mini bottled gingerales, saltines, crayons in a bowl on my coffee table, pink and lovely alstromeria in blue masons jars, and bojangles sweet tea & fries.

I’ve been reading articles today about blog optimization, and blog followers, and how to run a successful one. I think in this case, it really starts with my readers. So what do you want to see more of here?

I’ve created this nifty little poll, this will help me narrow my focus and give YOU more of what you want to read here. Please pick your top 3.

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If there is something not listed that you’d like to read more about, please comment below. Thanks for being a reader of kellycain.com!

I am in love, LOVE, with Amy Butler’s fabrics.

I am doing some nursery pre-planning, and ikea trip prep, and I’ve almost wanted every single Amy Butler fabric I’ve laid eyes on. Here are a couple I’m swooning over.

Watch out for the full nursery plan, in about a month!

It feels painful. But it’s undeniable when it’s happening. That feeling of discomfort, for awhile, or for a long time. The kind of change I’m talking about comes from within, not external circumstances with change. But that kind of gut-level, heart-level deep kind of change that comes along every now and then & makes you re-evaluate, and re-examine life as you know it.

I was recently with a group of women who were talking about how they couldn’t pick out circumstances in their lives, like when someone asks you a question, for example, “What was a pivotal point in your walk with God?” They would come up blank. I don’t know if it’s some kind of grand flaw, or a blessing in disquise, but I’ve always been so introspective, so self-aware, that at times it’s really painful. I know when I’m “not myself.” I know when I am completely myself. I even know the in-betweens.

A lot of it is necessary to go through life to know the “triggers” to read the internal “gauges.” In a book that truly changed my life, called Changes that Heal, he talks about how there is a formula for change.

conflict + time = change

Interestingly enough, in my Beth Moore study (mentioned in this post) she talks about this formula, in the life of David, how the dynasty of Saul (over time) grew weaker and the kingdom of David was growing stronger. Bringing about the Lord’s promise.

In my life lately there has been a bit of conflict, with my health, wrestling with the Lord, and more that I’d rather not mention. It’s so comforting to know that this conflict, will bring about change in my heart and my life. As I am formed closer into His image, as I was created.

So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Genesis 1:27

Becoming what we already are in Christ, what a glorious and painful process!